Of Toothpaste and Birthday Cakes
by catastrophicxhymns
Summary: Hermione forgets Draco's birthday and he demands cake in return. She gives him something a little different.


_Just a little oneshot I wrote in about ten minutes to celebrate Draco's birthday today. Enjoy!_

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><p>If someone had told Hermione Granger three years ago that she would one day be <em>willingly <em>living in the same quarters as Draco Malfoy, she would have gotten them checked into St. Mungo's immediately.

But, nearly two years ago, Hermione had found herself in need of a flat – a cheap one, as she was doing her Auror training and had no income whatsoever. One thing led to another, and she found herself sharing a two-bedroom apartment with Draco Malfoy (who was in a similar situation), who, if not _nice, _was at the very least civil. Or, more so than he had been before the war.

"Malfoy!" Hermione yelled as she heard the front door open. She stalked out of the slightly cramped kitchen and accosted Draco, who was in the process of throwing his things - and himself - onto the living room couch.

"Malfoy, what is this?" Hermione said, with a forced calm.

Draco raised his eyebrow as he eyed the item in Hermione's hand. "That's toothpaste, Granger."

Hermione looked as though she was one second away from lunging at him. He took a cautious step back. "Er – very..._special _toothpaste?" Her expression didn't change.

"Look, Granger, if this is one of your weird Gryffindor games or something -"

"Malfoy, you slimy little Slytherin, how many times have I told you to put the cap back _on _the toothpaste when you're finished with it?" Hermione's voice started out a normal level but by the time she had reached the end of her sentence, was little less than a shriek.

Draco took another few steps back. "Merlin, Granger, it's only one little thing, I -"

"Yes, it's one little thing, but I've told you this every _single _day for the past thirteen months! Does anything get through that thick skull of yours?"

"I don't think that's fair, Granger, seeing as I beat you in last week's training test -" The smirk was wiped abruptly off of his face when Hermione finally snapped, jumping on his back and hitting him on the head repeatedly, punctuating each slap with a "point – five – percent – doesn't – mean – anything -"

"Ow – ouch – holy – get _off _of me, crazy lady -" Draco tried in vain for a few seconds to make her see reason, but opted in the end for brute force and pried her off, throwing her on the floor unceremoniously.

She stood up and smoothed the front of her shirt down with a dignified air. "Point-five really doesn't mean anything, Malfoy. And please refrain from throwing me on the ground in the future."

Draco, no longer taking any chances, nodded slowly. "Definitely not, doesn't mean anything. And so long as you don't _pounce _on me in the future, I won't. Also, I'll put the toothpaste's cap back on. Happy?"

"Yes. Oh, and don't squeeze it too hard either. Because then it spills over and dries up because _someone _doesn't put the cap back on and it becomes a crusty, toothpaste-y mess."

Draco mock-saluted. "Sir, yes sir."

"Oh, and I didn't _pounce _on you, either."

Draco snorted but didn't pursue the subject. He flopped down on the sofa, rubbing his head. "You must've given me a concussion," he muttered.

"Oh, man up," Hermione snapped and turned to walk away when - "Hey, Granger?"

She turned and looked at him impatiently.

"What's the date today?"

She looked at him, annoyed. "June something, I don't know."

"Rack your brains, it won't take that long -"

Hermione eyed him dangerously, but only said, "June – er – 5th."

"Right."

"So you knew the date? Why did you ask me, then?"

"Does that date mean _nothing _to you, Granger?"

"Look, Malfoy, if this is one of your stupid Slytherin games or something, I don't -" Hermione's irritated expression morphed suddenly into one of dawning comprehension. Draco looked on approvingly.

"Happy birthday?" she said in a small voice.

"Yes. Now go bake me a cake, woman."

Hermione bristled. "Bake yourself a cake, I'm not your _slave -_"

"But _Granger," _he said pleadingly. "It's my _birthday._" Hermione looked for a short moment as though she might have conceded, but then Draco, in his arrogance, made a fatal mistake. "And I deserve it anyway, for beating you in that test -"

The next few seconds were a blur that ended up with Hermione once again lunged on Draco's back, hitting him repeatedly on the head, this time accompanied with incoherent shrieks.

"Crazy – ouch - gerr_off -_" Draco was at this point quite drained and collapsed onto the carpet with Hermione in tow, both of them breathing hard. He attempted to roll out from under her, but since she tried to do the same thing, resulted in them getting even more tangled.

"How about it, then?" Draco said, barely above a whisper. "A cake?"

"No." Though adamant, her voice was soft and very unlike her usual tones. Good for Draco, too, because their faces were only a few centimetres apart and she might have blown his face off with her usual volume.

"You didn't even get me a present." Still whispering.

Hermione didn't appear to have heard, despite – or perhaps because of - their proximity and the fact that she was looking straight into his eyes as he said it. After a few seconds of just lying there, she responded softly, "Here."

Draco, all of a sudden, felt the space between his face and hers grow smaller and smaller until Hermione's lips met his with full force. For a few seconds, time itself seemed to have stopped and surely the sheer amount of electricity that seemed to be passing through them would fry his brain if she didn't stop -

Hermione broke the kiss off as abruptly as she had initiated it and grinned. "Good enough?"

Draco grinned back.

"Not bad, Granger. Some cake would still be nice, though."

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><p><em>It's not that good, but if you liked it, please, please review. I also appreciate constructive criticism or whatever. Thank you!<em>


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